Is No News Good News?
I'm about to find out.
(Rachel Maddow, left, and Laura Ingraham)
News sucks.
No, check that. The news sucks. I have forever respect for media who spend their days earnestly digging for truth, uncovering rare nuggets free of hype and the obvious.
That’s not me. Certainly not now. I’m referring to the people who grind at it, whose mission it is to tell us, I mean suggest to us, what’s going on. Beat writers who cover a city or town or education. Their pay generally stinks, most people hate them, and even their subjects consider them a gnat in their eyes.
What’s worse: Listening to a politician lie to you for 30 minutes? Or having to stand in a clubhouse for 90 minutes, waiting to ask a ballplayer one question, and that guy never emerges from the batting cage, the trainer’s room or the players lounge?
I did both jobs, one far longer than the other. I’d rather take the lies and get it over with.
I once asked Hal McCoy — HOFer, gentleman, god — if he ever thought about how many hours of his life he’d spent standing in the Reds clubhouse, praying for conversation. Hal wrote for the Dayton papers for, I dunno, 50 years. So. . .50 years times 170 games a year, spring training included, times 90 minutes a game.
Hal must’ve spent 20 damned years doing nothing but loitering between the lockers, um, pen in his hand — you know what I’m really meaning here, and it’s not his pen —-waiting for a pitcher to tell him what pitch he threw that cost The Club the game.
Hal never forgave me for that question.
(Cronkite. Not McCoy)
(Old) people love to reminisce about the great Walter Cronkite. Gave it to ya straight, he did, no right or left leaning. Reliable, trusted, worshipped. Maybe so.
What’d it be like today for Uncle Walter? Rough, man.
Social media dissecting everything, disrespect rampant. People orbiting their universes in general misery, pissed off at everything and everyone, usually for no tangible reason. “And that’s the way it is’’? Really, Wally? Let’s ask Twitter about that.
Which got me to thinking. What if there were no news?
What if I consciously decided not to give any time or headspace to what was going on? A full-on news detox.
I’m a lower-case news junkie. I’m not obsessed, just too curious and definitely too willing to engage. News as spectator sport is nothing but a cry for help. And Advil. Today, I choose to be cynical, angry and powerless! I watch certain news shows, I listen to certain news podcasts. God help me, I read the New York Times.
What if I stopped?
Not forever. But a week. Seven days without the wisdom of certain people whose names will go unmentioned here, because I know nothing good would come of revealing to youse the names of these devoted seekers of truth.
(LOL, OK? Keep your powder dry.)
What if I treated the news like a radioactive isotope?
A what, Doc?
Nevermind.
I’m gonna try it.
Starting Monday for a week, I will watch no news on TV. I will read no news. I will not suffer media people who try to tell me what and how to think. I will listen to two podcasts: Bill Burr’s Monday Morning Podcast and This American Life. That’s it. I swear. It’ll be a cleansing, sorta similar to what we do the day before a colonoscopy.
Sports is exempt, except when it invades my no-news bubble.
I am hoping that after a week, I’ll emerge dumber and happier. Maybe youse could join me and we can compare notes a week from Monday.
Now, then. . .
I’VE ALWAYS WONDERED what it’d be like to live in a country that’s in the world, but not necessarily of it. The Azores, maybe. Or Denmark. I’m pretty sure those people don’t wake up every day wondering what Putin did overnight. They might not have a Starbuck’s on every corner, but they don’t worry about socialism or the price of gas, either.
The Azores don’t have a target on their backs. Denmark’s back isn’t perpetually sore from having the rest of the world on its shoulders. They just live good, peaceful lives eating their Smorrebrod and drinking their Akvavit. Googleit, Mobsters.
It’s no picnic being the world’s superpower.
Who’s with me? Rapa Nui, anyone? We could spend a carefree week not doing anything but breathing occasionally.
PANIC IF IT MAKES YOU FEEL BETTER. . . Samaje Perine, max-effort guy, fan favorite, is now a Denver Bronco. If you assume the Bengals will cut Joe Mixon in June — saving $10 million in cap money — the team roster scoreboard of the moment reads, Starting Safeties 0-Starting RBs 0.
It’s a good reason for all you Mike Brown fans to crank up your chainsaws and come strong with the cliched rhetoric. Me, well, let’s just say it’s hard to type while I’m shrugging.
You’d think by now, The Fam (including adopted son Duke Tobin) would be getting some slack. A real game won’t be played for almost six months, time enough for the front-office savants to make everyone forget about Bell, Bates, Perine and whoever else might be packing.
Maybe we should all look at the roster today, and take note of the studs Duke and his boys have added in the past couple years. They done pretty good.
That said, the Men were the 29th-best running team in the league last year. And Perine was good at keeping St. Joe vertical.
MADNESS EXPERTISE lives here, but only before the games start. You can take my advice for Thursday and Friday. Or you can achieve the same result by torching a $10 bill, or whatever you spent to swim in your office pool.
UPSETS I LIKE THURSDAY AND FRIDAY. . . Furman, Drake, Boise State
TEAMS I’LL TAKE THE POINTS AND RUN WITH. . . Vermont, Oral Roberts, Charleston
BIG NAMES THAT WON’T SURVIVE THE WEEKEND. . . Baylor, K-State, Tennessee
PROGRAMMING NOTE. . .I’m blowing off TML Thursday, to spend the day degenerating at a local watering hole with walls of televisions, tasty wings and cheap drafts.
IMPORTANT STUFF THAT GIVES ME A HEADACHE. . . ESPN.com:
Diamond Sports Group, the Sinclair subsidiary that controls the regional sports networks for 42 teams across Major League Baseball, the National Hockey League and the National Basketball Association, announced that it has filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy on Tuesday night, three days before the end of a 30-day grace period it entered into with creditors.
Diamond owns the rights to 14 major league teams (Reds included) and must continue to pay them their rights fees; otherwise, teams would be free to break their contracts, at which point MLB might take over broadcasting duties
"Major League Baseball is ready to produce and distribute games to fans in their local markets in the event that Diamond or any other regional sports network is unable to do so as required by their agreement with our Clubs."
The plan, as Manfred explained it, would see the league try to get the games aired on local cable like usual while creating a new option for fans to stream local games.
Blah-blah-blah.
You’re gonna get Reds on TV, in some form or fashion. So you can keep telling us you won’t be watching them as you secretly tune in every night.
TUNE O’ THE DAY. . . Have I played this recently? Maybe. That doesn’t make it rock any less. Thorogood, channeling his Inner Chuck. Try not to dance in your cubicle.
Problem with the media is commodification, which has always been an issue, but seems to be more prevalent than in the past.
My dad worked at WKRC (radio and TV), WCKY and WLW, KTAR in Phoenix and WIBA in Madison. He still occasionally anchors the morning drive at KTAR when the main folks are out. He always said he had a face for radio. I, foolishly, decided to pursue a degree in print journalism in the early 2000s. I used to say I had a voice for newspapers (Appalachian Mickey Mouse on downers, if anyone is wondering...). I learned a lot and got an English (!?) degree out of it.
Problem is, what I learned was no longer applicable to the modern era, especially in the early to mid 2000s before the prevalence of Twitter and other social media. I learned how to cover a beat, which unfortunately has no relevance in today's world. I work in government (criminal justice) and write/edit court reports so at least the English degree is somewhat useful.
The beat is how you get info. What was it Yogi Berra said about learning a lot by watching? 99% thankless work for some tidbits that might eventually pan out, but it takes time, energy and determination for which most media outlets have no patience. God help you if you find something that might upset someone in power, especially if it impacts your employer's bottom line.
I'm 39. I'm glorifying the past way more than I should, and I know better. There's people out there fighting the good fights who will probably never be recognized nor appreciated for their efforts. At a base level, holding the powerful accountable was a core tenet of journalism, or at least that's what I keep telling myself.
I will join you in your news detox. I did it for two weeks last summer while traveling in Europe. I used the extra time to read some books I had brought. Actually detoxing on vacation or during the tournament is cheating a bit because the news time can easily be filled.
Re Perine, anyone who thought he was the replacement for Mixon was deluding themselves. He is perfect for what he was - a decent blocker and adequate to give Mixon a break. The downside of having two good years as a team is that other teams start picking off the players in free agency.