The Men Dance in the Footlights

Ten Things about a highly impressive national TV show down on the river

Imagine yourself an NFL defensive coordinator, the week before your team is to play the Cincinnati Bengals. What’s it like? Is it like walking into a lion’s den dressed head to toe in filet mignons?

Is it like playing cards against a guy named Ace? Or is it mostly like watching Joe Burrow video for hours, pausing only to whack yourself in the temples with a ballpeen hammer?

We god-up this offense weekly. In a minute, we’ll pause to speak of the guys who’ve really been the X Factor in Cincinnati’s four-game winning streak, including its not-as-close-as 24-18 dubya over the Buffalo Bills Sunday night. Hint: The unsungs don’t catch passes. At least not for a living. But briefly ponder this:

For a month or more to start the season, the opponent’s D-coordinator had to scheme for Hurt Joe, the QB who was moving like Captain Ahab and rarely strayed from the shotgun formation or the cocoon of the pocket. Now, for two weeks, the poor sap D-coordinator has to account for Healthy Joe, who shows no signs of stagnating.

What results is an early-game show such as the one Burrow & Friends laid on the 49ers last week, and the ticking package they handed the Bills in the 1st quarter Sunday. Other teams simply don’t have enough answers to all Burrow’s questions. Even if they did, they likely wouldn’t have enough good (and healthy) players to make the answers matter. The Bills certainly didn’t.

Herewith, 10 Things about Men 24, Bills 18.