Baseball is dead

And you can blame Brandon Nimmo

In the Money World of Major League Baseball, nothing is ridiculous. Nothing exceeds like excess. Money World’s ability to shock faded a long time ago. Now, there’s nothing to do but chuckle, each time a new free-agent signing is announced.

Baseball is awash in cash, at least in some outposts. We never know how much awash Baseball is, because private businesses aren’t obliged to open their ledgers for us to inspect. Safe to say the New York Mets are doing pretty well. They’re highly awash.

The Mets projected payroll for ‘23 is $336 million. That’s $103 million above the lux-tax threshold. Put into context, via a Buster Olney tweet, “The Mets’ luxury tax penalties for 2023 — just the penalties, beyond the record-setting payroll — are likely to exceed the payrolls of about 10-12 teams in the upcoming season.’’

That would include our Redlegs, whose projected payroll is $73 mil.

The $86.7 mil the Mets will pay for two seasons of Justin Verlander shouldn’t scare you. That’s funny money, as tangible to the Reds and their fans as a new Crosley Field on Mars. No, it’s Brandon Nimmo who should make you shiver.

Pretty good player, Brandon Nimmo. Hit .274/.367/.433 with 16 homers and a team-leading 102 runs in 151 games last year. Above-average CF, who benefited from good timing. There weren’t that many good OFs on the market this winter, especially CFs.

Then again, in seven big-league seasons Nimmo has topped 400 plate appearances exactly twice. He’ll be 30 by Opening Day. His career .173 isolated power is middle of the road. (I have no idea what “isolated power’’ is, but the smart people seem to think it’s important.)

Plus, you know, he’s well, Brandon Nimmo. He’s the epitome of Pretty Good.

The Mets are paying him $20 mil a year for the next eight years.

That should send you curling into the fetal position.

No disrespect, but if Brandon Nimmo is worth $162 mil, the Reds can do nothing but hand their fans white flags on Opening Day.

Lots of ridiculous money got tossed around last week. Three-sixty to Aaron Judge, three-hundred to Trea Turner, two-eighty to Xander Bogaerts. Carlos Correa became $350 mil richer just yesterday. The Giants or somebody will be paying Correa ‘til he’s 41.

Hundreds of millions here, hundreds of millions there. Pretty soon, we’ll be talking about real money.

Bob Castellini is, by most measures, a wealthy man. When it comes to owners of major-league baseball teams, he is standing on the corner of Please Help Me and Brother Can You Spare a Dime. This is a problem only if you wish to see the Reds play in October again in your lifetime. As for actually winning a world championship? Haha.

Baseball is like the country at large in one respect: Its middle-class is shrinking. Its rich get richer, its poor sign Luke Maile. Less than a decade ago, the Reds were middle class. Modest suburban home, a week at the beach, maybe even two cars in the garage. A team capable of keeping you amused through Labor Day. Now they live paycheck to paycheck and rely on revenue-sharing crumbs.

It’s not good for America to lose its middle class. It’s not so great for Baseball, either.

Brandon Nimmo just made $162 mil for being pretty good. Ponder that next July, when the local nine is 15-under .500.

Now, then. . .

MANY THANKS TO TWO VENERABLE Hemingways. They were to TML what Manny Mota and Gates Brown were to pinch-hitting in the 60s and 70s. (Lookemup, kids.)

Mark Motz and Michael Perry were fantastic in my absence. Anyone thinking they can duplicate it, please lemme know.

NO COMPLAINTS about The Men. I don’t believe I’ve ever typed that sentence. I’ve only been here 34 years, though, so give it time.

But really, what’s a problem? Anything? QB is Top 5, injury-free O-line is a strength not a concern, deep depth wipes out any hurts that do crop up. Taylor has created what he said he would, his top assistants are thought of as potential head coaches, trap games don’t exist, attitude is as good as last year, Bowl hangover is nonexistent.

Only thing I didn't like was the skeleton-man white unis. Lose those.

Credit Taylor, too, with the idea of putting together a montage of big effort plays that included just about every guy doing something above and beyond. A smart way of making every player feel important.

AS FOR SUNDAY, it’ll be interesting to see what the defense does with Tom Brady. The GOAT has aged in dog years this fall. He’s still capable of the stray miracle (comeback v. Saints a few weeks ago) but he looks more like Joe Flacco than Joe Cool.

WELL, OK, I GUESS. UC is extending Wes Miller’s contract. It’ll run through the ‘28-’29 season and pay him $2.95 mil a year. I understand the thinking. UC is heading into the Big 12, recruits like to know there’s at least a chance the coach they signed to play for is going to be around. And of course, contracts in major college sports don’t mean anything, anyway.

But, I dunno. Has Miller earned it?

I was able to watch some of the Shootout while attending a wedding over the weekend. Maybe the Bearcats 2nd-half heroics will be the start of something good. We can hope. But what we’re seeing generally from this team has not impressed. And while fans will cite the “mess’’ that Miller inherited, they don’t say much about the fact that Miller’s best players — outside of Lakhin — are John Brannen guys, not guys Miller brought in.

Plus, at this point, Miller isn’t exactly coveted by schools needing a basketball coach.

TRIP REPORT. . . Spent a few days in Annapolis, MD, at my nephew’s wedding. The home of the Naval Academy is quaint and picturesque and heavily tourist-ed. I prefer the simpler majesty of West Point, but if you want to eat seafood and shop, Annapolis is better. Very worthy day trip from Baltimore or DC.

I took an extra day to soothe my savage melancholia. Bethesda, Great Falls (pic above), Tastee Diner etc. Frequent Perusers know (too well) of my affection for my hometown, even as it has been damn near ruined by commerce and crowding. Tear-downs are routine in Bethesda now, as are those massive cranes signifying “progress.’’

I dream of winning the Powerball. I’d then present a blank check to the current owners of what used to be my house, demolished three years ago for a McMansion. I’d buy their house, then pay any price to have its gaudiness torn down and replaced with the house I grew up in.

TUNE O’ THE DAY. . . One of my favorite live renditions of a very good tune. Hang with it the whole way. You won’t be disappointed.