Who you Callin' Jabroni, Jabroni?

The fallout continues from Sad Sunday

Jabroni:

Slang. a stupid, foolish, or contemptible person; loser:

When it comes to loving our sports teams, we’re all jabronis at one time or another. Especially when we feel the jabronis in stripes stole our team’s win.

When KC tight end Travis Kelce took to the CBS mic at about 10 last night and referred to Cincinnati Mayor Aftab Pureval as a jabroni, Kelce himself instantly became a jabroni. A jabroni is as a jabroni does. You big jabroni.

As youse awoke today to lingering, crushing sadness and an emptiness only rabid sports fans can understand, let’s try to unravel some of the stuff that occurred late in the game. Warning: When we’re done, you might suggest the biggest jabroni in a world of jabronis is the jabroni typing these words.

Hizzoner, A. Jabroni Pureval

First truth: The Bengals should have won. They had the better team, the healthier team, the team that had beaten the other team three times in a row. The fact the Bengals didn’t win was not on the officials. Take care of your business.

Second truth: The game was not fixed or rigged. Roger Goodell was not sticking pins in a Zac Taylor voodoo doll at halftime. (A)social media did what it does after perceived bad calls. Its angry followers spread like germs in a petri dish. Just because a couple million folks with phones typed RIGGED doesn’t mean anything except a couple million folks have phones and can type.

Third truth: The calls that set off the Twitter masses — especially the “do-over’’ on 3rd-and-9 and the intentional grounding flag on Joe Burrow — had no impact on the outcome. That doesn’t diminish the fact that the calls were unusual at best. But in the big pic, they didn’t change the course of human events.

Fourth truth: The 3rd-and-9 mulligan was the correct call. The grounding was borderline. Hang with me here.

Here’s an aggregate of explanations for the clock FUBAR that gave KC an extra down. All are lifted from media accounts of the incident:

“Officials determined that a whistle was blown before the ball was snapped and instead of the Chiefs getting ready to punt they got another chance to try and convert on third down.

“The noise in Arrowhead Stadium apparently prevented the other officials from hearing the whistle. Bengals coach Zac Taylor was irate on the sideline. On the next play, Chiefs quarterback Patrick Mahomes was sacked for an 8-yard loss, but Bengals cornerback Eli Apple was called for holding. The defense was able to hold strong against the Chiefs and force them to punt after three extra plays.

”A member of referee Ron Torbert's crew tried to stop the play before it started after noticing that the game clock was running. It should not have been, because on the previous play, the Chiefs had thrown an incomplete pass. The attempt to stop the play wasn't seen or heard on the broadcast, nor did players and coaches appear to notice it. But once any official rules a play dead, it's dead. CBS showed a replay of the official trying to stop the play.’’

As for the grounding. . .

“(Zac) Taylor brushed off the intentional grounding call during his postgame press conference, simply telling reporters "It's hard to tell, I don't know."

Taylor was right. It was hard to tell. Burrow did throw the ball into the ground, just before being pounded by two Chiefs rushers. He had no intention of finding a receiver, only of avoiding the loss of yards. That said, Perine was in the area. A case could be made on Burrow’s behalf.

Howevuh. . .

“In fact, the grounding penalty and the clock snafu ended up not being big negatives for the Bengals. Cincinnati picked up a first down after the grounding call, and the Chiefs picked up minimal yardage after the extra third-down play.’’

Another non-call that had Bengals fans screaming Fix: A supposed hold of Trey Hendrickson by KC tackle Orlando Brown on the already infamous Ossai Play that set up the Chiefs game-winning field goal. It wasn’t a hold. If you watch the video, it’s clear that Brown’s left arm stays close to his body. It’s not hooking Hendrickson’s neck/shoulder area. Hendrickson’s twist just made it seem that way.

Allegedly, refs missed a block in the back on Skyy Moore’s 29-yard punt return just before the Ossai play. I couldn’t locate video of that.

Look, I understand the world we live in these days. Everything’s a conspiracy, everyone’s a cynic. It’s easier to claim conspiracy than to take the time to prove that claim is laughable BS. Tweeting fails utterly at that sort of diligence, anyway.

And yeah, when I had a team to love (RIP, Washington Redskins) I thought the refs were crooks, too. Being a fan doesn’t require a fan to make sense or think clearly. And certainly, the bigger/faster/stronger game has made some of the older refs obsolete.

But no one’s intentionally screwing your team.

Doc, you’re a jabroni.

Now, then. . .

COLLEGE BASKETBALL SEASON BEGINS TODAY, so let’s get to it.

When you praise a team that loses a game, you run the risk of patronizing that team. When you praise a team that blows an 11-point lead with 11:28 to play, you really risk patronizing that team. But even in defeat, UC showed it could play with a Top 5 team. That’s growth and maybe as UC fans that’s all you need from this year’s team.

But. . . live by the trey, die likewise. UC was 8-12 from distance in the 1st half, 3-15 in the 2nd. You’d like to see an offense that attacks the basket more, that works inside-out. Lakhin’s a legit scorer. Use that to create more space on the perimeter.

That said, promising stuff in Houston. No patronizing intended.

As for XU. . . As Boum goes, so goes X. Souley is essential to who the Musketeers are and how they want to play. In their previous L, at DePaul, Boum went 1-for-12. Saturday at Creighton, he took only five shots and missed four.

Xavier attacked UConn last Thursday and won. It didn’t attack at Creighton and got buried. The Musketeers might have been on a letdown, physically and otherwise, owing to the quick turnaround. But Creighton showed again X’s defensive shortcomings. The Blue Jays can shoot, but their defense might be more noteworthy.

MEANTIME. . . I’ve mentioned this before, but it’s worth repeating. X’s radio guys, Joe Sunderman and Byron Larkin, are very good and very overlooked in our town. Sunderman simply excels at play-by-play. I can close my eyes, listen to him and get a good picture of what’s going on. Larkin tells me what I don’t know, and he’s concise about it. Kudos, gentlemen.

BECAUSE TV IS MY LIFE. . . I discovered Accused on Fox last week, saw the first 2 episodes. Each episode is self contained, so you can pick up Accused anywhere you like. Ep. 1 was outstanding, Ep. 2 less so, but still entertaining. Smart, well acted, compelling TV, especially for a network show.

Also, at your recommendation I started Tulsa King. First couple episodes were very entertaining. Stallone’s effort at comedy was surprisingly deft. Since, King has lost some momentum, if only because a city dude in Tulsa is a one-joke premise.

What say you?

ALSO, I hear there’s this new show on CBS called Fire Country. Anybody know anything about it? (It’s a joke, Mobsters. No replies needed.

TUNE O’ THE DAY. . . These local guys were underrated as well. Great tune, among my favorite R-n-B singles,