Hemingway laments a game's demise

There's a little of him in all of youse

Today’s Hemingway is Sam Elsbernd, a Covington native, Holmes HS grad, Navy veteran and Special Education teacher at Pendleton County High. Sam has coached 17 years of high school basketball, most recently as head coach at Pendleton County.

He loves Michigan football. I promised him we’d read his stuff anyway.

Let’s raise our Keystones and give him a huge TML welcome. Take it away, Sam. . .

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At no point when I responded to Paul’s Guest Hemingway inquiry did I think I would get this opportunity. Just happened to read TML the day before Opening Day and figured I’d throw my bat out there and see if I could make contact. He said baseball-centric. No problem. A thousand words. Easy. People ignore me 75% of the time anyway, so if you are still here, I am batting 1.000. 

Baseball in Cincy these days could be described as the big party and then the other 161. Last week I almost forgot it was time for the big party. Opening Day is great in Cincinnati. Our tradition. First team. 1869. The Parade (Shout out to the Pendleton County High School ROTC who marched last Thursday. They have also done colors at games in the past. Their Classroom is across the hall from mine).  Findlay Market. Old Neighborhoods. Americana. We beat winter again, no one-game playoff needed, just the first game in the middle of the (latest) rebuild.

I used to know who would be in the Everyday Eight by March 1. On Feb. 2, 2000, the day they got Junior, I videotaped the press conference. Lynne Elsbernd (mom to me) once made me a scrapbook from newspaper clippings of the ‘90 playoff run. It’s somewhere, it just has to be. Like to think I am a good son… but sorry mom, I have no idea where it is today. 

Herb and Thelma’s

They get you when you are young. Grandpa is the only person I ever met who honestly would think this team has a chance. After D-Day he thought every day was a win. He and Nuxy had one belief in common, the Reds were always going to win that day. Can still remember him sitting in the yard over on Leonard Street, windows open, radio playing from the kitchen. Those were the days. I haven’t listened to a game on WLW when not in my car in a decade-plus. Rest in the side yard Max, they aren’t mathematically eliminated yet. The guys at Herb and Thelma’s say hi.

Speaking of which, why is it if I’m not going to a game or a concert there is no chance of getting me to go over the Suspension Bridge? I could drive NKY blindfolded, in reverse, during a snow storm and never get lost. If I am north of the Aronoff. . . GPS.

Couple games a year, couple trips to Riverbend. That’s all, folks. The soon to be wife (Kelly) is from Northside, but I met her down here in the sticks. The stepson-to-be (Evan), a senior in high school, plays right field for Bracken County. Good arm, puts the ball in play. Fundamental baseball, it’s fun to watch. 

I’m 38. Why did I used to love baseball? Two divisions, actual pennant races (Braves-Giants ‘93 anyone?), pitchers hitting, and your team had to be GOOD to play interleague play. 

Gone are double switches. Insert a bunch of dudes swinging for the fences like it’s Softball City on a Friday night. Managers don’t have to think, sabermetrics doesn’t recommend it. 

Three divisions were cool, one wildcard was all right. Two was a made for TV, one- game playoff. Three is the best synonym for stupid you can come up with. Fight to get in? Nah. Set your pitching staff up for the play-in series, to get to the original play-in series, to get to the LCS, to get to November? YES! By that point, I’m thinking more about the Michigan-Ohio game. 

September is now nothing more than the NFL saying thank you, we get all the press from the opening kick. 

Dad (Daryl) will be 70 on Veterans Day. He was the knothole coach. He threw a lot of BP at 24 Holmesdale. He caught a lot of 33 MPH heaters from his 7-year-old. You’ve heard this story before, young boy loves the game because dad does. I caught for that team, thank heavens. The game is boring if you have to play any other position. He still swears it’s a baseball town. You’re wrong, pop.

In my nearly forty years, sans ‘90, it’s been all about Who Dey. My dad’s teens and early 20s gave him the Big Red Machine. Every baseball conversation since then has included them. I went to Pete Rose Weekend, which was before Pete Rose Statue Night, and said “How else can this organization make money off something from 40 years ago?” It’s been nearly 50 now. They still try. (Side note, I wore 14 in high school.)

My teens and early 20’s (oh what a time) gave me the arrival of Marvin… and Bodes trading away the farm system. Playoff losses were better than no playoffs. Chad, TJ, and Carson started the revolution, Andy and AJ kept things steady, the Baton Rouge duo and Tee have hammered it home.

Meantime, the 2012 Reds had a chance to get this city back, a legit chance to win it all and reel in a generation of youngsters just like me in ‘90. They struck out. 

Erin (the younger sister) and I went to the homestand where The Kid chased 500 back in the middle of the Reds lost decade (00-09 was a wasteland). He came up one short against, I think, those pesky Rangers. We both loved the game then, I guess we still do. Now she has season tickets to Pay Joe Stadium and made the trip to Arrowhead for the Showdown the past two years. We are saving money to hopefully go to Round 3 down the street from the Small Park next January. 

The national pastime is now Cincy’s pastime. The opener drew 44k, the other 80 won’t, unless they are good, which they haven’t been for a while. 

Couldn’t tell you the last time I watched Baseball Tonight. These days, give me a good documentary on YouTube or Prime at 10:00. I’m at the age where Ken Burns becomes worth talking about. 

Tell a kid today about This Week in Baseball and you get “what’s that?” instead of “how about that!” Trout and Shohei did what they could to make us care in the WBC, but they ran up against the Cinderellas, who unfortunately kept winning. 

I’m a big fan of the upsets early in the NC2A tourney, but I turned on the Final Four to watch bluebloods (which Connecticut has slightly become), not nosebleeds. Last weekend was something to watch, not appointment viewing. Monday night was more coronation than competition. 

Monday Night followed by the Masters starting a mere 54 hours later is one of my favorite weeks of the year. One of these years I am going to get selected for the ticket lottery that gets me the right to buy my two tickets. There are a lot of stadiums and events I’d like to see. I’ve gone to see the Wolverines play at the Shoe and Notre Dame. Those were fun but there will be more opportunities. Been to a few NFL Stadiums and MLB parks. You just cross them off the list and maybe get to the others. I need to see Augusta. That place is once in a lifetime. 

Hunter Greene was on the bump for OD, hopefully he is like King Felix Hernandez was when I was stationed out west. Seattle is beautiful in the summer, can’t recommend it enough. 

Every year I’d want to take leave and get back to Kentucky for the first Saturday in May. People near Puget Sound didn’t respect that sacred day.

Enjoy the pitch clocks, bigger bases, limited mound visits, and two throw-overs allowed for the next six months. The favorite sons have a chance. They’ll surprise everyone and get the six seed, right grandpa? 

AND NOW. . .

Our Fun-espondent Michelle says if you’re bored this weekend after reading this, something is wrong with you.

FC Cincinnati ~ Saturday join in the pre-match fun at Washington Park 4:30-7:30 with family fun games, live music and more. Game time is 7:30.

Stroll, Sip, Shop & Support Local~ First Fridays on Eastern Ave. This is such a fun area of town and if you haven’t hung out there you need to do it! Visit all the fun businesses like Pearls bar, The Bookery, Streetside Brewery, Manitou Candle Co., CoCo Creative Wellness all offering discounts and fun 5-8. 

Dance or Skate to 2nd Wind Band ~ Friday 6-10 on Fountain Square! This band will getcha movin’ and don’t forget they have the box bar on the square for refreshers. 

Last call for Pennifolds Pub ~ This fun PopUp Bar has been a great spot for all Harry Potter fans. So grab your wands and stop in for Butterscotch Ale and wizard fun before it turns into a new adventure. Friday 4-Midnight and Saturday noon-midnight. Behind Findlay Market 1834 Race St. 

Savor Dinner ~ Cincinnati Magazine hosts a foodie’s dream.. Tuesday - Friday they have two different local chefs collaborate each night to create a one of a kind 5 course meal with a wine pairing experience. It’s hosted by Hard Rock Casino so you can try your luck at winning some $$ after dinner :) Grab tickets for this fun event through Cincinnati Magazine. 

Where have I eaten lately ~ Shiners at Newport on the Levee! Serving up traditional smokehouse BBQ, really good brisket and a fun rustic vibe. They even have live country music, country dancing and karaoke nights. You need to check it out! 1 Levee Way Newport, KY 

Hey Michelle,

Do you want to know where to eat, drink and have fun in Cincinnati? Follow me @HeyMichelle1 on IG 
https://heymichelle-help.com

IMBIBER DAVE ENJOYS REDS-N-BREWS

Another wonderful week for imbibing. Started the week off strong with a Monday night at the ballpark that felt like a mid summer game. I’m not talking about the fact that it felt like there were 500 people in the stadium. I’m saying that the weather was perfect, and the Reds continue to have the Cubs number and beat them.

I enjoyed every single one of the rule changes. All of them lead to tons of offense, which is exciting. I’m looking forward to a new breed of pitcher, that throws super fast and has better stamina to still rifle through batters.

Despite the ghost town atmosphere, the Hustle and Rounding Third Red Ale battle rages on, and both continue to be delicious.

Green Christmas started today, aka The Masters. I was lucky enough to walk the grounds myself this time last year, and the fireworks returned right away again this year. It’s going to be a perfect weekend.

Cheers!
cincybeerguydave@gmail.com

TUNE O’ THE DAY. . . No one goes to the Small Park for the music, but the music is part of the ambience. I’ve tried to help out the Club with its offerings because it is an established fact undeniable that a body can tolerate only so much Centerfield.

I suggested Petty’s I Won’t Back Down whenever the Reds were in the midst of a rally. Have the other guys bring in a reliever as the crowd sings with Tom, “Hey-y-y-y, baby, there ain’ no easy way out.’’ That tune also seems in keeping with the ‘23 club’s mindset. Shoulder chip and all that.

For the 7th-inning stretch, I like this one. Mellow, warm, moon up, worries down. This tune just sounds like baseball in July.

Gimme yours. If I get enough, I’ll ship ‘em down to GASP and see what comes of it.