Any Given Embarrassment

Ten Things. The Bengals make us cynics again

First of all, I’d like to apologize to the New York Jets and their fans. I’m sorry I said your team was terrible. I’m sorry I said Mrs. Fields was a better quarterback than Justin Fields. Justin Fields forever, man.

Just because I called the Jets a semipro team. . . and said that Breece Hall drove an Amazon truck during the week. . . and that the coach Aaron Glenn delivered pizzas in Queens. . . that doesn’t mean I don’t respect them.

Please forgive me, J-E-T-S. I promise never to says another bad word about your team. I’ll save all the bad words for the Bengals.