A.J. is retiring already?

Didn't he just catch a bomb from Dalton?

A.J. Green caught a TD pass that beat the Browns in his first NFL game. It was September 2011. Seems like last week.

That 227-yard game against the Ravens — which prompted Baltimore coach John Harbaugh to wonder, "Can we cover him once before he retires?" — that was a few minutes ago. Had to be. Certainly, it wasn’t eight Septembers past.

AJ Green had more catches, yards and TD receptions than any Bengals wideout not named Chad. I remember most the one he didn’t catch. Wild card game in Houston, January 2013, Green’s second season. Third-and-11 from the Houston 36, Texans up 19-13, 2:57 to play. Green wide open in the back of the end zone, Andy Dalton overthrew him.

Crushingly disappointing. Who knows how the playoff future of those Marvin Lewis teams might have been altered, had the Men won that game? It would have stopped the Bengals postseason skid under Lewis at three games. Instead, it never ended, reaching seven before Marvin left.

And oh, the irony: Count on the fingers of one glove the number of times Dalton overthrew Green in their 10 years together as Bengals. That Texans game was, like, seven minutes ago. I’m sure of it.

Players come and go. Even the great ones. Their greatness doesn’t guarantee their longevity. Not in the NFL. Adriel Jeremiah Green played 12 years. It was less than an instant, or so it seems. One day he’s catching lots of passes and enjoying (or enduring) the sort of flash fame specific to athletic stardom. The next, he’s signing off in an Instagram post.

“I’ve stayed true to the game and it owes me nothing’’ was part of what Green wrote yesterday. That’s completely Green. Humble, respectful, appreciative and deeply mindful of the transactional nature of the game. The same qualities that prodded his success on the field, guided his actions off it. He was a Man from the day the Bengals drafted him.

Green was a freak for his ability to dance a sideline or emerge with a deep ball with a couple DBs riding shotgun on his shoulders. I always said Dalton should have begun each season by giving Green half his paycheck. The bombs Dalton called in the huddle seemingly were scripted like this:

“AJ, go deep as fast as you can, I’ll throw it as far as I can and you catch it.’’

Pro Football Focus broke it down:

Receiving Yards from Deep Passes (20+ YIA) from 2011-2017 1. A.J. Green - 3,273 2. DeSean Jackson - 3,000 3. Julio Jones - 2,747 4. T.Y. Hilton - 2,622 5. Antonio Brown - 2,594

Green was also freakishly good at not acting like he was freakishly good. No choreography in the end zone. No making his teammates wait to celebrate him until he’d finished his little, solo one-act play.

The numbers say Chad was better. That’s why they’re numbers. Between 2016 and 2019, Green missed 29 games because of injuries. Hamstring, toe, ankle. Missed all of 2019. Johnson played 24 more games than Green as a Bengal, He had 1,353 more receiving yards, 102 more catches and one more TD catch.

Would Green have passed Johnson without the injuries? It would have been close.

Contrary to popular perception, the Bengals rarely have been without exceptional “skill position’’ players in the Mike Brown Era. Carson had Chad and TJ, Dalton had Green. Even Jeff Blake got Lost in a Decade with Carl Pickens and Darnay Scott.

Now, there is Burrow to Chase. It might be the combo that leaves the rest dusted and sitting on the Remember When? shelf. That’s how it works with athletes and, unfortunately, the people who worship them. You can never be so good that you can’t be replaced, sooner or later.

Props to AJ Green who’s retiring from a brilliant career that lasted about 11 days. Shelf lives are for memories, not for the people who make them.

Now, then. . .

REGARDING BILL BURR. . . The comedian. He has a podcast that is occasionally burn-down-the-house hilarious but more often is too long and F-laden. His bit on the NFL Draft was an instant classic and captures perfectly my sentiments on the league’s annual self-spectacle.

“We need to improve the defensive line. . .’’

Burr’s podcast can be great way to kill an hour.

What else?

You’ve got an hour — on a plane, in an airport, driving to Dayton. At 3 in the morning when you can’t sleep — what is/are your preferred method(s) for killing time? I have some podcasts. I listen to them when I’m walking Crazy Chester the maniac dog.

This American Life is good. The New Yorker Radio Hour. A couple news shows. Burr.

I play Strat-O-Matic baseball. It’s a dorky thing to do. So?

Right now, I’m revisiting Season 1 of Twin Peaks. It’s 31 years old and is better today than it was then, and it was damned fine then.

What do you do to kill an idle hour, Mobsters?

SORDID, THE SEQUEL. . . The story of the recruitment of high school QB Jaden Rashada appeared in This Space last week. Here’s a recap from The Athletic of the entire scummy experience, to this point. I don’t know how anyone could read this and come away feeling good about the state of college sports in 2023.

Kid’s been manipulated and used the whole way. Education, indeed.

SLOW GOING TODAY, Mobsters. What can I say, it’s February. Better tomorrow.

TUNE O’ THE DAY. . . IMO, the finest version of an often-covered tune done originally by Delaney and Bonnie. (I can remember that, but not where my wallet is.)